The calendar seems stuck in a repeat date. A language glitch prevents diversifying conversation. Monotony sits at the table while the pain of communion drops the temperature. A second cup of coffee and a tea are of no help. Awkwardness settles, honesty dictates what we do next. Chanting this is childhood’s end, we each depart to our houses until we never meet again.

I am reminded once again I occupy an absent seat here. My energy feeds from other sources, I am being pulled to the side and reprimanded for choosing to come back. “Look around,” it asks me, “are you in absolute delight?.” I shake my head no.

If you are not buzzing with energy, you may want to reconsider where you are.

We were insincere in our interaction, avoidant of true conversation… familiar strangers. Trust was absent to truly open up. Interest in the other flatlined despite at times convulsing and foaming in the mouth.

Pack up and go.